updates~~

well..it gotta be such long not to be here..
reading back previous post..what the sh*t im writing..no idea..arghh..
these days being so emotional..losing my mind..everything out of control
but still glad to get to know some new friends..
there's a friend must be mentioned here..
who i consider her as my jie jie deep inside..
always feel safe and easy to be with her,unlike other gals..u can be as free as u like..
but guess what,she is at the same age with me..
she's so mature..she know many things..so firm..
honestly im kinda guilty and ashame to look at myself(my immature)..not at physical thingys..but the way she take things into her life..though she just doing pastry..suddenly feel that everyone is pretty..LOL..weird feeling..
and also went through crazy days..erm shud say crazy nightss..haha..for instance we go port dickson beacj at late night..omg..tis is crazy..
oh yeah..just got hair colored..and this is red!omg..luv it!
ok..it's time..gotta take some rest..
hope can come back here with my new lappie..probably next week..

很讨厌这样的自己

我不想忘记你
我在向前走却像在退后
我在用想念狂欢寂寞
越快乐就越失落
爱将我们高高举起以后
再让心学会坠落
怀念这宽阔的天空
虽然那里空气很稀薄
我努力想起你笑着哭泣
让自己深爱你再学会放弃
我不想忘记你
就算可以
我宁可记得所有伤心
我努力想起你苦也没关系
用祝福和感激勇敢失去你
爱你这个决定
虽然艰辛
我不说对不起
一个人不懂什么是拥有
两个人不懂怎么把握
越在乎就越脆弱
爱将我们高高举起以后
再让心学会坠落
怀念这宽阔的天空
虽然那里空气很稀薄
我努力想起你笑着哭泣
让自己深爱你再学会放弃
我不想忘记你
就算可以
我宁可记得所有伤心
我努力想起你苦也没关系
用祝福和感激勇敢失去你
爱你这个决定
虽然艰辛
我不说对不起

你只不过是我不小心掉入地狱里偶遇的一只魔鬼。
已经傻傻给你太多太久，已经到了尽头了。
这次一定会收得很干净，一点都不留。永别了。

empty

all these days..been so down..


never feel so alone before..just need somebody to talk to..anyone..but who..no idea..


this make me miss the moment..happy moment very much


those memoirs with my sis,dearest friends,tao colleages(some),and especially avrillians with bunch of jokes that hurt my stomach..aww...damn i cant online!!


now what i feel,what i see..EMPTY..


no idea why im walking,why im cooking,eat for wut,drink for wut..

butterfly

afterall, whether can be considered as settled down anot..continue is the only thing to go for.. continue laughing, continue crying, continue suffering, continue everything..

what hv been worried all came along, the mind suddenly was like stucked..why did i worry abt tis befor?everything is so natural, and has its own faith.. what should have come will come in its own way..its own timing..u can't judge or be prepared to wait for its coming..

now only i can see.. see everything that hidden behind..

it make me believe..yeah..i can sense that this is a believe.. before all these things,dont have anything to believe in..not believe in anyone..thought that i do trust everyone, gud or evil..until get hurted..all this is a process..maybe..is the way God came to me..enlighten me the way to believe..send me a him who i thought is so far different to me who i thought is totally a jerk.. now i take his words into account..cant believe..tis make me believe everyone on the earth have the chances, have potential, have the possibility to change the world..and bring miracles..

maybe it's too drastic.. need time, need answer to those answers..and what is the exact answer, i dont know..nobody noe..juz let it come..and we will all know..or maybe not..cuz everything is changing in every second..

look at myself..from chidhood till now..*bitter laughing

used to be very talkative, kinda active in everything without fears when was a young gal..and da spirit faded..and then now..LOL..maybe am one kind of transformer species..famous into infamous, sort of 'intransform' right..aha,u noe what it mean..zz..

used to hv many friends..all range of friends..and now..due to some shitty situation,have to push em all aside..and never feel so alone as before..hate this feeling cuz it was like cold ice stack, penetrate thru the skin and muscle and reach the bone..everything is slugging..but nevermind, it is not fatal..im ok..no worries..

people, do believe caterpillar will turn into butterfly one day..

M-I-S-E-R-Y

disappointed.................................................................

小冬瓜

就在头脑胡思乱想，想不开的时候，很emo的时候，sifu打来问我要不要去打badminton.他竟然叫我小冬瓜。我傻了一下，想想之前我有在他面前做出小冬瓜的举止吗？哈哈!
不过这小冬瓜称号来得正好，好希望能够做回我以前的‘小冬瓜' 。蹦蹦跳跳边哼歌去。。。。。。lalalalala...